I feel like the holiday season almost magnifies my singleness. I really did not ask for it to be magnified. I have actually been quite content about my singleness. Mostly, I have been very focused on grad school, work and church. I like to say that I will not be accepting applications for a husband until 2017. Until then, I don’t have the energy or time for counterfeits. If you haven’t read my blog posts “Afrotastically Single: Part 1” and “Afrostastically Single: Part 2,” please do so! You will understand my current mindset.
As I am human, I have had some fleeting thoughts about my state of singleness. First, I have thought: “It would be nice to go ice skating with someone.” Yes, I know that I can go ice skating with one of my female friends, but it is not the same. I mean, will one of my female friends ask me if I want a cup of hot chocolate and buy it for me? Can I act all shy and giddy? Can I have those silly butterflies in my tummy?
The answer is: NO! NO! and NO!
Second, I have some thoughts about being single at holiday events. If you have ever been single at a holiday event, you tend to feel out of place. And I know that everyone has felt that awkwardness at some point in their lives. In the last few years, I have gone to family gatherings in which I have been one of the few folks without a boo boo or a child. Now, I am not asking for a boo boo or a child right now. I just want to point out that it gets old when you continue to bring your single self to the festivities. Couples are chatting and taking pictures. Kids are running around and screaming. Then, there is single self chilling with her mama. It’s really not that bad..I am exaggerating. I have to be honest though; I do wait for the day that I will be able to bring my boo boo to one of these gatherings and get to introduce him to everyone.
Maybe, I will bring some mac n’ cheese or candied yams to this year’s gathering. Then, at least, I will be holding something.
By now, I hope that you can see that I am approaching the subject with humor. At times, I have wondered too much about why I am still single or what I have done wrong to remain in this state. Right now, I want to wait on God and actually think about what qualities I am looking for in a man. So far, I am looking for husband material. He must be a Christian, handsome, smart, quirky, and socially aware. Although I can have a whole list of qualities, God could turn that list upside down. It is really up to Him and to His will.
In the meantime, I will be with my mama at the family gathering! I will be grubbing on food and watching the kiddos play.